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Joke of the Day

"What food are you able to can? Cannibal (can able) food."

"""We've been doing this for years, I simply can't be bothered thinking up another long scientific name. Drink?"" - people who named the fly."

"I would watch NASCAR if the drivers had had as much to drink as the fans."

"What's a priests least favorite thing about New Years? The balls drop."

"Went into a five-star hotel to use the bathroom and now it's a two-star hotel."

"What's the best part about fucking 28 year olds? There's 20 of em'"

"A boy was sent home from school... And his mum says to him 'that's the second time this week you have been sent home because students were giving you handjobs. Maybe teaching isn't for you.'"

"Ganondorf doesn't use Reddit There are too many Links"

"What's black and runny? Usain Bolt."

"My friend got drunk and thinks he had sex with a prostitute... At first he wasn't sure, but then he was *positive*."