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Joke of the Day

"Technically everyone who's not a doctor is premed"

"Have you ever seen moth balls? You have? Then how the hell did you get their legs apart?"

"Why couldn't the Soviet Union get anything done? They were always either Russian or Stalin."

"What did Captain Ahab say when he harpooned a whale's tail fin on the first try? ""Well that was a fluke."""

"Kim Kardashian's starts a new political party, and names it Popular Back"

"Sitting on the porch late one night. A fox steals up and settles quietly next to me. Pearl divers don't hold their breath as long as I do."

"If you're testing me, we failed."

"All these knights going on a quest for the Holy Grail was a waste. They should've just asked their moms. Moms can find anything."

"How do you circumcise a redneck? It's quite simple, really. You kick his sister in the jaw."

"Guess what? I fucked your mom"