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Joke of the Day
"*puts little Santa hat on cat* Hahaha Santa claws *puts little Santa hat on dog* Hahaha Santa paws"
Next Joke
"I used to listen to old Mitch Hedberg recordings.. I still do, I just used to too."
"'Ukraine's crisis has been caused by the west.' - Putin"
"What I want for Xmas... I asked Santa for a sister. He asked for my mom."
"I'm surprisingly calm about Internet spoiling Star Wars to me. Who could believe Kylo Ren is actually vegetarian and grandson of General Akbar"
"Nixon had to be photographed at an angle to make him appear upright. One of the drawbacks of him having a list."
"What do you call a pun in a marathon? A running joke"
"Teacher: I want you to tell me the longest sentence you can think of Pupil: Life imprisonment !"
"[whole foods] WHITE GIRL: excus me do u hav pumpkin EMPLOYEE: (hands her a pumpkin) here WHITE GIRL: no no no. PUMPKIN. its a type of spice"
"why public hairs not gone white ?"