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Joke of the Day

"[me on my death bed after being trampled at a one direction concert] please tell people it was auto erotic asphyxiation"

"What's worse than finding a worm on your apple? The Holocaust"

"I've never had personalized license plates, but don't worry, I still know how to waste most of my discretionary income."

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Anthem ! Anthem who ? You Anthem devil you !"

"9 year-old attempts to follow a recipe: ""It says here to separate the eggs. How far apart do they have to be?"""

"Finally got funding approved for the gay club I'm opening in Prague. The Czech's in the Male"

"They say people and their pets start to look alike, which is why George Clooney is now tied to a tree in my backyard."

"At my local police station, the toilet was stolen The police have nothing to go on"

"Happy Greek Easter! Which Greek God loved to collect animals? Zoos"

"What type of bee makes milk? A boo-bee"