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Joke of the Day

"I'm really conflicted about abortion. I support killing babies, but I don't support giving women a choice."

"that's disgusting (unless you're up for it?)"

"Can you open your mouth without showing your teeth? You're hired."

"Why do woman vacuum? So they can practice there sucking."

"What's the difference between a Lamborghini and dead babies? I didn't lose my virginity in the back of a Lamborghini."

"A stormtrooper just got sent to the firing squad. He will be missed."

"So, a baby seal walks into a club."

"I got in trouble once for copying another kid's test I guess the teacher heard my Xerox machine"

"What is the difference between anal and oral sex? Oral sex makes your day. Anal sex makes your hole weak"

"twitter might remove the 140 character limit so i'm putting some 800 word tweets with character development & plot twists in my drafts"