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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between jam and jelly? You can't jelly your dick down a whore's throat."

"I've decided I'm selling my vacuum cleaner It's just here gathering dust"

"So my girlfriend told me her dog ate some tampons... I told her to call the vet, maybe they can pull some strings."

"What's the difference between the 9/11 attack and a dairy cow? You stop milking the cow after ten years."

"What's the smartest piece of lab equipment? A graduated cylinder."

"How did our grandparents killed time when there were no Smartphones and Internet? I already asked my mom, her four sisters and five brothers."

"How many people does it take to screw in a light bulb? One."

"I was telling my therapist I keep dreaming that I'm in a helicopter crash He said I've got black hawk down syndrome"

"President Putin say's he is doing everything he can to wipe out Aids Researchers. (What too soon?)"

"There are plenty of fish in the sea. There are also sharks, giant isopods, oil spills, Flight 370, and Somali pirates."