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Joke of the Day

"What was the last thing Hitler said to his men, before they got into their tanks? Men, get into your tanks."

"Fractals joke there are 2 types of people in this world, those who don't know about fractals and those who think that there are 2 types of people in this world..."

"When you ""assume"" you make an ""ass"" out of ""Ume,"" my Hawaiian buddy, who hates assumptions."

"I bought a time machine. I bought a second hand time machine next Tuesday. They don't make them like they're going to anymore."

"I hate horror movies where everything goes back to normal at the end. You just had a demon inside you, but yeah, let's go for pancakes."

"I always like to have snacks while I surf porn. That way, I'm packing on the poundage while I'm pounding on the package."

"Why didn't the cow want to go skydiving? ...the steaks were too high."

"What did the statistician say to the hooker as he pulled out his 5.2-inch manhood? ""I heard you suck a mean cock"""

"If Batman left church early... Would it be a Christian Bale?"

"Two Ducks Two ducks in the airing cupboard, which one is in the army? The one on the tank......."