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Joke of the Day

"*Kanye West's dating show* 10 women stand in front of me and I only have 9 roses. BUT WAIT... They're all for me *Kanye wins dating show*"

"Today my dad told me that he quit his car vacuuming job after the first day. He said it was a sucky job"

"Why can't you trust a person with two butts? Because they're bi-assed."

"I like to shit with the door open, because it keeps other people from getting onto the elevator with me."

"Shaved my girlfriend's cat. Think she'll take the hint?"

"Why didn't the airline passenger check his vulture? Because it's a carrion bird."

"My sex life is like flipping a coin. I'm not getting head whenever I chase tail."

"Kanye West compared his relationship with Kim Kardashian to Romeo and Juliet. So we won't have to deal with them too much longer, you guys."

"My grandma had a lock installed on her medicine cabinet poor thing no one's ever going to visit her again"

"what did stevie wonder say when he recieved a cheese grater for Christmas? it was the most violent book he had ever read"