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Joke of the Day

"""I don't have to run faster than the bear. I just have to run faster than you,"" I say to my hiking companion. It is Usain Bolt. A bear waves"

"Camping is a great way to show people that you hate your own home but can't afford a decent hotel."

"I have been try to come up with a funny joke about leeches. I couldn't because they all suck"

"I have benefits if anybody needs a friend."

"Tits are like Golf You just play the course you're on."

"Isaac Newton was the pride of the family until his great great grandson Fig was born."

"why does a prostitute make more money than a drug dealer? she can clean her crack and sell it again"

"How do you know if somebody graduated from Harvard? They'll tell you."

"An Irish man walks out of a bar... Not likely, but weirder things have happened."

"What did Amy Winehouse have in common with the Ghostbusters? They both downed spirits."