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Joke of the Day

"Psychiatrist ""Tell me about your trust issues."" Me ""No"""

"What's the difference betweens jews and Santa-Claus? Santa Claus comes down the chimney"

"Hey Tuesday, I'm about to go to 2nd base with you. Lube up your boobs."

"I see you're busy. I'll come back and ruin your free time."

"I got into an accident a few days ago. The doctor said the bleeding was all internal. I said ""oh, thank god."" The doctor said ""why are you so happy?"" I said ""that's where the blood is supposed to be!"""

"Joseph Smith sold so many copies of the Book of Mormon That they made him a prophet."

"Why was epsilon afraid of zeta? Because zeta ate a theta"

"You know you have a weight problem when even your car insults you. It flashes the word ABS at me and won't stop."

"What's a best friend? One who goes out and gets two blowjobs, then comes back and gives his buddy one"

"TIL a post won't be removed if it is in the wrong subreddit."