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Joke of the Day

"You had me at ""I bet I can get that whole thing in my mouth."""

"Going to church doesn't necessarily make you a nice person... It does, however, make you sleepy."

"My manicurist mother and dentist father didn't like each other... They fought tooth and nail all the time."

"I'm joining a cold war reenactment group. We get together on weekends and hide under desks."

"My next door neighbour just confronted me about her clothes going missing from the washing line .. I nearly shit her pants"

"My Girlfriend My girlfriend is an epidimiologist and I'm a stand-up comedian so that means I have a lot of chores I have to go do. Later."

"Mom! Mom! I'm pregnant!! Oh God, honey, where was your head at?! Ummm against the passenger door, I think"

"what do you call the skin around a vagina a woman"

"Someone should make a food app that connects to your bank account and only lists restaurants you can afford, could call it Welp"

"Why do cowgirls walk bow-legged? Because cowboys always eat with their hats on."