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Joke of the Day
"Pretty disappointed to find out HGTV doesn't stand for Hugh Grant TV"
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"Shaving your head when you're going bald is the ultimate ""You can't fire me, I quit."""
"greasy... Q: Why are you so fat? A: From eating your mom's greasy pussy."
"Life has never given me lemons It has given me anger issues, anxiety, stress, a love for alcohol, and a serious dislike for stupid people"
"What is the difference between a corvette and a blowjob? Your mom never gave me a corvette."
"I read that Hebrew lesson book so many times, I know it from back to front."
"What do you call a? What do you call a convict walking down some stairs? Con-descending"
"Why can't a bicycle stand up by itself? Because it's two tired."
"Her: What are your desires? Me: My desires are..[imagines having a talking Pug named Maurice that I watch Netflix with]...Unconventional."
"How do you make a hormone? Don't pay her!"