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Joke of the Day

"A baby mouse is out for a walk one day and sees a bat... He quickly runs home to his mother and says ""Mummy! Mummy! I just saw an angel!"""

"Removing make-up or as I like to say, Resetting face to factory settings."

"Being God means never having to say you're sorry. Or anything, really."

"Why did the coke dealer retire? He was tired of putting his business in other peoples' noses"

"Why did the bicycle fall over?? Because it was two tired..."

"Every 5 out of 6 people say Russian Roulette is fun... I wonder why the sixth guy hates it"

"You know the difference between Sadistic and Masochistic? No one has ever called me a masochistic son of a bitch."

"[NSFW] What's the difference between jelly and jam? I can't jelly my dick down your throat."

"Why do kangaroos hate rainy days? Because all the kids have to play in side."

"Two blondes are waiting at a traffic light One says ""It's green."" The other ponders a few seconds, then replies ""A frog"""