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Joke of the Day

"How do you make holy water? You boil the Hell out of it. My 12-year-old daughter claims to have invented this joke this weekend. I don't know if it's original or not."

"American light beer is like two people making love in a canoe... fucking close to water"

"When a coworker says ""This is all Greek to me"", I always assume they want me to punch them right in their throatopolis."

"I like my women like I like my ice cream... Smooth, pale, cold, and recently extracted from a freezer."

"What's J.D. Salingers favorite thing to have in a sandwich? RYEbread...."

"What do you call a piano that approves. A piayes."

"Can't you see I'm on an important phone call with a host from QVC?"

"What do you call a Nazi who left the war to become an animal doctor? A Veteran Aryan"

"Whoever called it a ""dust bunny"" was in a super good mood."

"Q: How can you tell if a violin is out of tune? A: The bow is moving."