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Joke of the Day

"If you want to go running with me, you'd better be prepared to walk a lot."

"What did the hurricane say to the palm tree? Hold on to your coconuts, this ain't gonna be your average blowjob. As told to me by a passing homeless man yesterday..."

"Absence makes the heart want to fondle other people"

"Where did little annie go after the explosion? Everywhere!!"

"Why couldn't the restaurant patron get into his car? He had Gnocchi."

"I knew she was about to say something intelligent because she began with, ""You once told me..."""

"How to get holy water? Boiling the hell out of it"

"So a midget psychic broke out of jail the other day... the headlines read ""small medium at large"""

"My wife got mad at me because apparently turn on the veg doesn't mean.. Finger her disabled sister"

"I can't believe my kamikaze joke crashed and burned like that!"