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Joke of the Day

"Mary had a little lamb, little beef, little ham, tacos, burritos, cream,cheetos,chocolate cake. Her waist was wide as whoah!"

"I thought I saw Bradley Cooper but it was just every poem ever written formed into a beach sunset with amazing hair"

"How did I get the balls to write such a grotesque joke? Gruesome."

"How many redditors does it take to make a good joke? Three. One to post it, the second to post a better punchline in the comments, and the third to complain that it's a repost."

"My girlfriend and I went to the bank and opened a shared savings account, mostly for buying weed. ... ... It will be our joint account."

"What is the cheapest meat? Deer testicles. They're under a Buck."

"I'm always disappointed when I board a plane and there's no handsome man running after me to stop me. Thanks, hollywood."

"A man was asked if he would rather have a new circular saw or a ladder... He chose the latter."

"I finally talked to my crush today I told her that she smells different when she's awake"

"Gary Coleman died of multiple aneurysms.... which is kind of like Different Strokes."