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Joke of the Day

"Here's a UPS joke Too late I rang the doorbell, but no one answered. Will redeliver tomorrow. No, you can't come pick it up."

"God, Clark Gable's performance in ""Gone With the Wind"" sucked... ...It's like he didn't even give a damn."

"DNA What do you get when you mix human and goat DNA? [Kicked out of the zoo.](/spoiler)"

"-Knock Knock! -Who is it? -The love of your life. - :) Really? -Hahahaha no, it's the pizza you ordered."

"What did Cinderella say when she got to the ball? Nothing. she couldn't speak while gagging"

"What kind of salad dressing does a tree use?"

"I keep having this reoccurring dream Every night I dream I'm constantly changing between being a teepee and a wigwam. I went to the doctor and he told me ""Calm down kid, you're two tents.""."

"What do you get when you breed an elephant with a rhino? A visit from the university board of ethics."

"What do you call a Muslim abortion clinic? counter terrorism"

"If the employees in your human resources department were all very into Aleutian sea birds. . . Around Christmas time, everyone would be sending HR Puffin Stuff."