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Joke of the Day

"If I had to pick between being a hardcore Democrat and being a hardcore Republican I would definitely choose a noose."

"My friend composes lyrics about sewing machines. She's a Singer songwriter."

"ONLY Justin Bieber could make doing drugs look not cool..."

"Q: What's the difference between a lentil and a chickpea? A: I wouldn't pay $200 to have a lentil on my face."

"How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? None, there's no need for a lightbulb with a glass ceiling."

"Sponsor a Child I was thinking of sponsoring a child in Africa. But him being so far away, how could I be sure he actually completed the Fun Run?"

"What is ISIS's favorite kind of coffee? Decapitated"

"Why do businessmen carry umbrellas? Because umbrellas can't walk."

"Channel 4 are making a documentary about a black man producing cocaine in his bedroom, they're calling it, ""CHOCOLATE & HIS CHARLIE FACTORY."""

"What does the Interstellar soundtrack and a porno film have in common? Swelling organs."