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Joke of the Day

"Don't buy drinks from children on the side of the road. The money never really goes to aid for lemons."

"I was going to say a StarFox joke But they were all too Corneria"

"me: How many calls do I get? cop: one me: What do you think is more likely? a lawyer delivering pizza or a dominos providing legal counsel?"

"Why does Reddit have so many reposts? Because you already read-it."

"What's 6"" long, bent to the left, and in the front of my pants?? My iPhone 6."

"Why was the guy wearing the fedora upset? Because you didn't ask him what band he's in."

"Just drank two 5-Hour Energy shots. Will I get 10 hours of energy? And why is that rainbow giggling at me? AndAHH MY SKIN IS ON INSIDE-OUT!"

"The lights in my house love me... ...because I always turn them on."

"because yoda was in charge of the jokes why was the punchline in the title"

"""OOOOOH an email!"" - me, every single fucking time I email myself"