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Joke of the Day

"Onions My friend told me that onions are the only edible plant that can make you cry. I bludgeoned his head with a watermelon."

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"If con is opposite of pro .... then is Congress the opposite of progress?"
"give us a pickup line related to your profession WITHOUT revealing your profession. we'll try to guess I might have posted in the wrong sub Reddit. let me know if we should move it!"
"What do creationists and neutron stars have in common? Density"
"What is the difference between a teacher and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family of four..."
"I met a guy with a tattoo on his penis that said ""Shorty"". When he got an erection, it said ""Shorty's Truck Stop Chattanooga, Tennessee""."
"Hey Reddit, what are your favorite lame jokes? ""Wanna hear a pizza joke?"" ""Nevermind, it's too cheesy."""
"You know what I don't get? Laid."
"Vacations are a great way to spend thousands of dollars to stare at your phone in exotic locations."
"One problem with autocorrect is that you always end up posting some thong that you didn't Nintendo."