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Joke of the Day

"'You have an important event coming up? OwmeeGod, count me in!' -pimples."

"What's a pirate's favorite letter? You might think it's R but his first love will always be the C."

"why did the lawyer of a satanist go to hell because he was playing devils advocate"

"I'm done telling racist jokes because... Once you tell Juan you tell Jamal"

"The US Defense budget is 40x bigger than NASA's. It's surprising we actually went to the moon instead of blowing it up."

"My chess board grew a tumor Thankfully it's B-9"

"So is my call important to you or will it be answered in the order it was received? IT CAN'T BE BOTH!"

"I couldn't figure out how to use my seatbelt.. Then it clicked."

"My friend was run over by a car. And man did he lose his head over it."

"I was going to tell a joke about a vacuum But I realized it sucked."