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Joke of the Day

"At some point, a guy looked at an onion that was clearly purple & called it red. AND WE'RE JUST SITTING HERE LETTING IT HAPPEN."

"Did you hear about the household appliance that eats ants and records TV shows? It's the VCRdvard"

"Why is milk the fastest liquid on the planet? It's pasteurised before you can see it!"

"I had a dodgy dwarf do a bit of casual building work for me. He asked to be paid under the table."

"You guys know why I don't drink fancy coffees? cos they cost a latte."

"Which African country has the most obese inhabitants? Burkina Fatso"

"What does daenerys give to tyrion? A hand job"

"When do you stop on green and go on red? When you are eating watermelon ."

"The assistant asked the blonde if she would like her pizza cut into six pieces or twelve. ""Six please"" she said ""I could never eat twelve!"""

"So a man goes to work... Memed XD im a grill btw so upboat plz."