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Joke of the Day

"At some point, a guy looked at an onion that was clearly purple & called it red. AND WE'RE JUST SITTING HERE LETTING IT HAPPEN."

"The worst thing about doggie style is you can both see your kid come into the room."

"I'm gonna steal a bunch of Jesus fish off minivans and then put them back three days later."

"An alien, a predator and a terminator walk into a bar... and then... I've got nothing. Someone finish the joke!"

"It's hurts for me to say this... But I have a sore throat."

"So a prisoner took his own mug shot... He called it his ""cellfie""."

"But do you know what 6.9 is? A good thing screwed up by a period."

"hey remember back in the day when a coke only cost a nickel and everyone was just horribly ridiculously racist"

"I stayed up late last night to watch the greatest boxing match of all time Ali vs. Parkinsons"

"is this Sara? hi, this is Tom from HS. my god its been years! Anyway, im calling because u changed your HBO Go password & I need the new one"