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Joke of the Day

"Give a man a fish and he'll eat for a day Teach him to fish and you have lost a profitable business idea"

"Find someone to make you laugh everyday and if that doesn't work find alcohol like I did."

"Known as the ""one-day insect"" the Mayfly has the shortest lifespan of all organisms... But it still lives longer than my headphones."

"Whats this new apple product I keep hearing about? A: Whats this new apple product I keep hearing about? B: Which one? A: the I-sis"

"Why'd the short man take the elevator up? He was feeling down"

"I didn't have a condom last night, so I used a sock... She wouldn't stop complaining about cotton mouth."

"Helen Keller walks into a bar And a table, and a chair"

"""You're what you eat"" So when will your mum become me?"

"Do you know what the one vegetable that isn't actually vegan is? Terry Schiavo."

"What's a pirate's worst nightmare? A sunken Chest with no booty"