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Joke of the Day

"I walked to the bus stop. This morning I walked to the bus stop and I saw a man there, drinking out of a paper bag. So I said, ""Morning!"" to be friendly And he said, ""Nah I'm just an alcoholic."""

"Two Cannibals are eating a clown. One turns to the other and asks... Does this taste funny to you?"

"My wife left me *sobs uncontrollably*"

"They just discovered a terrorist cell in Rome... this summer we might have Italian Isis."

"My analogies are like vacuums.... They suck."

"This morning I went for a run and came back home after 2 mins because I forgot something... I forgot that I was fat and could only run for 2 mins."

"What feels good in the west but feels cotton in the East? Happi-ness"

"Here's how clickbait works"

"I hope my childhood BFF forgot that silly pact we made at five to kill each other if we hadn't become ponies by 2015. She was really dark."

"Why is Starbuck's coffee so high on the pH scale? It's the most basic drink there is."