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Joke of the Day

"This year I got my wife the Baking Bible for Christmas because last year I got her the Baking Quran, which really blew up in my face."

"The NFL was considering issuing small bats to referees to ""knock"" the balls to check for proper inflation during the Super Bowl... but then they realized that was queer."

"Two brothers were sitting on a plane One said the the other if the plane flies upside down, would we fall out? The other replies, no we'd still be friends."

"She told me to give her nine inches and to make it hurt... So i fucked her three times and punched her in the gut."

"What concert costs 45 cents? 50 Cent featuring Nickleback"

"Why do mathematicians dislike cloth rugs? They prefer fur mats."

"Mom asked if I wanted to race toy cars with my neighbor Chucky. I responded, ""Nah, that's child's play."""

"What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you? ..............you pull the pin and throw it back!"

"What does the snicker say to the other snicker? DEEZ NUTZ, Ha! Goteem!"

"a C, Eb, and a G walk into a bar... The bartender says ""sorry we don't serve minors here,"" so the Eb walks out and the C and the G have a fifth between them."