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Joke of the Day
"Nice try speed bumps, it's a rental."
Next Joke
"My drug dealer gave me new shoes today. I don't know what he laced them with, but I've been tripping all day."
"I am going to make millions when I finally finish developing this iPhone app that tells you when the traffic light turns green."
"How did the medical community come up with the term ""PMS""? ""Mad Cow Disease"" was already taken."
"No matter what sexual role play idea my wife decides on, I always have to play the same character... The husband that's out of town."
"There's a reason the iPhone autocorrects ""Yolo"" to ""tool."""
"Groaner Running out of sausage is a busy pizza maker's wurst nightmare."
"Date: so what do you do Me: i build dog houses Date: oh you're an ""arf""itect lol Me: haha good one Date: Me: (under breath) it's ""bark""itect"
"What do you call a bunch of black dudes in a shed... Antique garden tools."
"Rabbit: Are you sure this bottle of special carrot juice will cure me? Doctor: Absolutely. No rabbit ever came back for another."