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Joke of the Day

"I'm not the hero Gotham deserves. I'm Pete I work at Subway. Do u want extra meetballs."

"I scream. You scream. We all scream. ISIS laughs."

"A lot of women can't drive because they're too busy giving mixed signals. @MaleHonesty86"

"Don't you hate it when dontyouhateitwhenpeopledontusespaces"

"The Gay Magician Hey, Did you hear about the gay magician?........... He pulled a rabbit out of his ass!"

"I went to a porn star's funeral yesterday... ...I woke up with mourning wood"

"On this day in 1969, the 1st episode of Scooby Doo appeared on TV, beginning a golden age of teenagers getting high in the back of vans."

"I told my buddy that Jewish people call god by a different name He was like, ""No way!"" I was like, ""Yahweh"""

"If all women said yes There would be no more rape."

"Sadly, at 8:11 PM Mark Jones was mispronounced dead. [at hospital] Doctor: I'm afraid this man has deed. Am I saying that right? He's deed."