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Joke of the Day

"People who take tons of photos of themselves Have no selfie control"

"Does an Eskimo ever think about drizzling their house with delicious flavored syrups and eating it?"

"Why didn't the drummer commit the crime? He couldn't handle the repercussions."

"In honor of America's upcoming Independence Day, do you know why America spells ""behavior"", ""color"", and ""humor"" the way they do? Because **fuck u**, that's why!"

"I thought I would go and help out in Africa... ...turns out they have enough aids."

"Why would anyone want to study the Earth and how it rotates? I guess that some people just want to see the world turn"

"*prepares to cook vegetarian chili* *spills the beans* Whoa, I suppose you could call that.. *lowers shades with a spatula*.. Kidney failure"

"When my cousin came out as gay, his parents wanted him to see a psychiatrist. Which is too bad. Cuz he was already seeing a handsome lawyer."

"Would you like to hear a joke about violence and torture? What is WRONG with you!"

"Why did you buy me a pair of bunny ears? I wanted you to have a hoppy birthday!"