174403

Joke of the Day

"Can't make an important life decision so I'm gonna try and find a wise old black man to impart some wisdom like they do in movies."

"What do you call a pony mixed with a robot? RoboClop....so sorry"

"Why does a chicken coupe have two doors? If it had four, it'd be a chicken sedan!"

"Guy Fieri's parents were two lyrics websites"

"Why did Saint Francis cry? Someone called him Assisi."

"""Kill two birds with one stone."" When in history was there a surplus of birds and a shortage of stones?"

"When asked about hobbies, don't start lap dancing. #jobinterviewfail"

"Hey, boy. Are you a Swiss army knife? Because you're a smaller, less effective version of everything I need."

"""Food expiration dates are lies. It's all about control."" My knife breaks as I cut into a plate of milk. ""I'm saving this for later."""

"Everyone, stop with the Jell-O jokes. They're off-pudding."