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Joke of the Day

"My own joke that I'm incredibly proud of: What kind of weather do Black Prince tomatoes grow best in? Purple Rain"

"[crime scene] detective flips open pocket watch Hmmm...precisely what I thought ""What's that sir"" closes watch It's lunch time"

"I didn't think my son would make a good postman. But he delivered."

"What do you call a dinosaur that rapes? A sexual predator."

"Have you seen the special message written at the bottom of a condom when you roll it all the way out? Me neither.."

"Why do seagulls live by the sea? Because if they lived by the bay they would be called baygulls. My dad loves this joke."

"My boyfriend is hung like a work of art. Specifically, Michaelangelo's David."

"GOOD COP: The sign on your door says NOTARY NOTARY: Yes? NOT A GOOD COP: *menacingly leans onto desk* Sounds like something a RY would say"

"How do you start a rave in Africa? Glue toast to the ceiling."

"So an elf walked into a bar... The hobbit laughed and walked under it."