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Joke of the Day

"How do you start a rave in Africa? Glue toast to the ceiling."

"""I have a friend..."" ""I have a friend who watches Japanese anime and likes vandalising Renaissance art with drawing pins."" ""Really?"" ""Yeah, he loves A Tack on Titian!"""

"Its so busy at work... I feel like a priest and all my tickets are altar boys, I need to touch them all."

"My downstairs neighbor was yelling and banging on the ceiling until 3 AM Did that bother you? Not much. I was up til about the same time practicing my trumpet."

"I'm into cryogenics. All the cool kids are doing it."

"Went in for a prostate exam... I asked the doctor where I should put my pants. ""Right over there with mine""..."

"When do you know that you are getting old? When you have babies on purpose"

"What do you call Zombie Japanese Chefs? the Woking Dead"

"You know what they say about assumptions, right? They say that they are generally wrong."

"There are 10 types of people in this world... The ones who understand binary, and the ones who get laid."