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Joke of the Day

"""The Spoon"" Patient: Doctor, I have a pain in my eye whenever I drink tea. . Doctor: Take the spoon out of the mug before you drink."

"Why is DeadMau5 bad at math? He drops the base when doing logs."

"I just put on my khakis and found a golf tee in the pocket, which may be the whitest thing to ever happen to anyone."

"Girl, yo grammatical atrocities so huge, you need typosuction."

"Did you hear? The invisible man and the invisible woman just had a son. In all honesty, he's not much to look at"

"Jews would love to believe in Santa.. ..but they're not fans of anybody that keeps a list with peoples names on it."

"Why are black people afraid of high fives? They don't want to be left hanging"

"My wife asked me why I suddenly froze in one position during sex. I said: ""It's a new move I learned from PornHub. It's called 'buffering'."""

"Why there are so many avenues in France? Because german soldiers like to march in the shade"

"""No comment"" said no woman, ever"