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Joke of the Day

"What do you use to cover a herpetarium floor? Reptiles."

"Did you know pigs have orgasms that last 30 minutes? This is God thanking them for bacon."

"A man once taunted Chuck Norris with a bag of Lay's potato chips, saying ""Betcha can't eat just one!"" Chuck Norris proceeded to eat the chips, the bag, and the man in one deft move."

"Q: ""How many members of the coalition does it take to screw in a light bulb?"" A: ""We are not prepared to comment on specific numbers at this time."""

"Did you hear about the french TV show Did you hear about the french TV chat show that only airs on a thursday? Richard and Jeudi"

"Talking about school grades with your parents like... Parents: Got any A's this semester? Me: Go fish."

"I just discovered a subreddit called /r/abs Turns out it wasn't about arabic culture."

"[throwing a party] I invited Judas. That okay? ""Judas from IT, or the guy who betrayed Jesu-"" *loud knock* ""It's the Roman legion. Open up!"""

"How does someone stop ISIS? Change their name to past tense, WASWAS."

"Why are redneck murders the hardest to solve? All the DNA matches and there's no dental records. Edit: made it to the hot page, my dad would be so proud, if only he knew who i was"