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Joke of the Day

"""And this is my creepy husband, John."" (The way my friend should introduce her husband)"

"My friend Dave told me this joke about Hillary Clinton yesterday... I was just wondering if anyone here has heard from him?"

"""I see,"" said the blind man, pissing into the wind. ""It's all coming back to me now."""

"I like my beer like i like my violence.. Domestic"

"What's with these people who take a sip of their coffee as soon as they get it? Who are these iron-mouthed warriors?"

"Shouldn't you pet him first? Two guys are in a park and see a dog licking it's nuts. First Guy: ""Damn I wish I could do that"" Second Guy: ""Shouldn't you pet him first?"""

"Woman driver is like a star on the sky You see her, she doesn't see you."

"What is a priest's favorite snack? Little boysenberries."

"What do you call a vegetarian fart? Kale force wind!"

"Q: Did you hear the slogan for the the new ""Stealth Condom?"" A: ""They'll never see you coming."""