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Joke of the Day

"M'lady, What is the most beautiful thing in the world? Is it your right thigh, or your left? Or does the answer lie somewhere in the middle?"

"So, a baby seal walks into a club... *Best joke i've ever heard.*"

"I've discovered a magical land through the back of the wardrobe, it's inhabitants are similar to my neighbours, albeit a lot more hostile."

"When I worked for the USPS a number of years ago I found the work to be slightly monotonous. It really helped me work on my delivery though."

"That awkward moment when someone says ""stop"", and you don't know whether to respond with ""collaborate and listen"" or ""hammer time."""

"I get chills down my spine every time I hear the song Stayin' Alive... I don't know, there's something about the Bee Gees that just gives me the heebie jeebies"

"Maybe your d*ck is so small because half of it is in your personality."

"Where does Sean Connery sit? In the toilet."

"A blonde, brunette, and a red head walk into a bar Wow, these are great binoculars!"

"my marrige is just like my time in prison nothing but fucking and fighting, Im just kidding I never fought in prison."