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Joke of the Day

"I wish i could Google anything. I'd type: ""where da fuck iz my phone?"" and it'd be like: ""in da fridge dumbass."""

"What is brown and sounds like a bell? Dung!"

"Interviewer: where do you see yourself in 5 years? Me: In a mirror! Well any reflective surface really, windows, shiny cars, puddles..."

"Where did the piglets study their ABC's? At a school for higher loining."

"How many Germans does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. German light bulbs don't break."

"Why didn't the Jews fight in WWII? They all went camping."

"2017 ""Did you just assume my species?"""

"Why did the bait-shop owner take an apprentice ? He wanted to be a master-baiter."

"How many psychologist does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one, but the light bulb is going to need to change itself."

"BREAKING NEWS: Facebook is down. Worker productivity rises. U.S. climbs out of recession."