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Joke of the Day

"I've never held a baby before ""It'll be fine"" *I accidentally put the baby in a box and mail it to North Korea*"

"I want a girl who asks me to do things that I have to Google."

"Where do muslims go when they die? Everywhere."

"This really crashes my belief system. Hilary Clinton spent 40 years building up her career to lose presidency to a man who picked up politics as a hobby last year."

"Two Calamari Two calamari walk into a pub. Bartender asks, ""What'll ya have?"" ""We'll have a Hurricane and a Sex On the Beach"" says squid A. Bartender pauses and says, ""That'll be three squid then."""

"what did internet man say to other internet mam ""dank meme"""

"What do you call it when you meet somebody in a bathroom at a conference? Pee-er to pee-er networking (P2P)."

"Thanks to advertisements I know I need to help the diseased, the pregnant and those dying of cancer... And then have a smoke."

"I'm an Asian male who scored a 2300 on the SAT I still don't know if i met my parents' expectASIANs."

"Masturbation: It *comes in hand*y."