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Joke of the Day

"My dad called me a fool for taking a job at the penny factory. But the truth is it makes a lot of cents."

"I just got an email that Netzero closed my account due to inactivity, I guess that must have taken 12 years to get here."

"I am now referring to my parents as numbers like you guys refer to your kids. 72 & 70 are coming to visit, send wine."

"If you're a Sanders supporter at a Trump rally, what protocols do you need to follow? The Protocols of Zion, apparently."

"After seeing some of the things posted on /r/Jokes lately, I believe it's time someone finally said something. Something."

"Winds of 108mph, structural damage, flying debris, massive depression, icy blasts, communication difficulties, untold misery and suffering... Yes, I forgot our anniversary again."

"Did you hear about the whale who couldn't keep a secret? He was a blubber mouth!"

"What do you call the mercury mine? Hg wells"

"How to cook the perfect amount of pasta: 1. Pour out how much you think you need 2. Wrong"

"Anonymous doesn't hack Chuck Norris Chuck Norris can't use a computer."