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Joke of the Day

"It's 2011. If you're still using a payphone, you probably deserve to be negotiating some sort of ransom."

"Taxidermist's Wife: Whatcha thinkin' about? Taxidermist: Stuff."

"I told my wife I wanted to try anal sex. She told me she had been having sex with an A-Hole for years."

"Congratulations West Ham The only club named after two things that ISIS hate."

"What's the difference between a pothead and a gay Muslim? Potheads get stoned by choice."

"A sports expert is the guy who writes the best alibis for being wrong."

"When I got my new job, my boss said I could name my salary But he said ""paltry"" and "" inadequate"" were already taken."

"I couldn't figure out why someone was brushing their teeth out here at work, then it hit me... My wife always brushes after sucking cock too!"

"FYI: You can't make rose by running red wine through a Brita filter."

"The wife told me to go out and get some of those pills that will help me get an erection. You should have seen her face when I came back and gave her some diet pills."