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Joke of the Day

"What do you call an Islamic comedian? A Funni Muslim"

"They say the way to a man's heart is through his stomach... Unless he's a vegan. Then you can get there through his vagina."

"My biggest fear used to be dying alone but thanks to Trump, I know it'll be in a camp, surrounded by other minorities."

"What's the difference between a fish and a guitar? You can't tuna fish!!!"

"My best friend ran away with my wife.... I miss him."

"""Sorry, but none of my clothes fit today."" My date nods, and politely avoids looking at my towel and safety pins."

"For easter I'm going to smuggle drugs into prison with my anus. I'm calling myself the keister bunny!"

"If you know I'm I the car and you continue to text me, you basically want me dead..."

"Why are most rappers afraid of vending machines? Because eminem's in there (Sorry, it works better when it's spoken)"

"Karate classes... Because breaking boards on your head is all cool and shit if a House ever starts attacking you."