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Joke of the Day

"How many therapists does it take to change a light bulb? One, but the light bulb must want to change."

"Dear Fox News, So far, no news about foxes. Sincerely, Unimpressed"

"Sticks and stones may break your bones, but a Chuck Norris glare will liquefy your kidneys."

"I always wanted to be just like my mother. Today I'm working on dramatically clutching my throat when I'm told the price of anything."

"Whats the difference between a South African tourist and a racist? About a week or so"

"Knock knock Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave breaking down into an emotional wreck and mess of tears at the realisation that the Alzheimer's has finally taken hold."

"After the machine uprising, robots in the club will dance ""The Human"" by compulsively overeating and playing with their phones on the toilet"

"What is quivering at the bottom of the ocean? A nervous wreck."

"Last night I slept for 8 hours straight, and then for 2 hours gay."

"What's the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a lawyer on a motorcycle? The vacuum cleaner has the dirtbag on the inside."