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Joke of the Day

"I'm still waiting for the day that I will actually use x2 + why +8 [(x + 2y 2 = a-z] + 2x 3 + (- 2z = 2. 4) + 10y 5Z 3= k= 9 in real life"

"Fighting a war on drugs beats fighting a war sober"

"What kind of joke is the best joke? The one shoved up your ass. (As told by my adorable and naughty 7 year old)."

"Why do Jews love sandwiches? Because they're not made in ovens."

"I'm not sure who's more drunk, me or the guy wrapped in Christmas lights standing in the mirror."

"This morning some bloke drove up to my house in a huge lorry and dumped off a massive pile of lego blocks. I'm so furious I don't know what to make of it."

"Whats the difference between your mom and a washing machine? When I drop a load in the washing machine it doesn't follow me around for a week."

"What do you call a dead blonde in a closet? The winner of last year's hide & go seek contest."

"Which is the most religious vegetable? The Pope-tato"

"Cell references in excel are like gold diggers. If you want them to stay in the same place you have to throw some money at them."