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Joke of the Day

"Drag slicks are a lot like condoms... ...you don't really mind a broken one until you realize how expensive it's going to be."

"What is something that tastes better than it smells? A tongue"

"A guy walks into a bar. A guy walks into a bar with a block of asphalt under his arm, he says to the bartender ""I'll have two beers, one for me and one for the road"""

"""My goodness, you've grown a foot since I last saw you..."" ...said the doctor in Chernobyl."

"An Australian man walked in on his girlfriend getting changed and she said ""Have you heard of knocking?"" He said ""It doesn't ring a bell"""

"On sex, Confucius say: ""Couple who have sex on side of hill, not level"""

"The Inventor of the jug died today. Tributes have been pouring in."

"I ran out of toothpaste recently So I've resorted to brushing with soap. It's pretty gross, but on the plus side I've really cut back on my swearing."

"Which murderer is the safest to be stuck in an elevator with? The ax murderer of course. He will always ax you before murdering you."

"If you see me running down the road crying, it's because I hate running."