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Joke of the Day

"Treat your relationships as you would your teeth, daily attention and they could last a lifetime, too bad the same can't be said for hair."

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"What's Irish and sits on a deck? Patty O'Furniture"
"Jehovah's Witnesses are like testicles They come in pairs, one is always bigger than the other, they keep knocking on the door but never get in, and if they do, shits about to get freaky."
"Do NOT lower your standards to ""keep"" anyone. Make them meet you at YOUR level. Self respect is power."
"MUST HAVE BEFORE WATCHING THE CONJURING : - Bible - iBible iPhone app - Holy Water - Priest - Jesus - 5 Jesus necklaces - Holy Spirt"
"Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because seven was a registered six offender"
"What animal do I respect most? The octopus. I have no idea what to do with my hands most of the time, and I only have two of them."
"What is the origin of the word ""Boob""? The ""B"" is the aerial view, the ""oo"" is the front view, the ""b"" is the side view."
"I was in Feruson, got jumped by 5 black guys It started right up, they said I just need to replace the battery."
"BE WARNED I am taking careful note of all of your sins and reporting back to God in my nightly prayers"