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Joke of the Day

"Where did Abdelhamid Abaaoud do most of his craft shopping? Wahabi Lobby."

"I want to become a waiter so I can hear a lot of people say ""Ish reaahy ghuud."""

"What is the softest bed for a baby to sleep on? Cot-on-wool."

"Do you know the biggest difference between Mexico and China? China paid for it's wall."

"Want to leave a lasting impression? Show up three hours late for a first date."

"My self esteem is so low.... The other night my hand told me that it had a headache."

"Yes, you're drawing your eyebrows too high. Don't look so surprised."

"What dog is always tired in London? An English sleep dog."

"I once spoke to an extractor fan. He said to me, ""I used to like farming vehicles, but now I'm not so fond of them."""

"Why did the blonde throw tic-tacs in her spaghetti? The recipe told her to mints her garlic."