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Joke of the Day

"Why don't emus ever finish all the food on their plates? They don't want to be ostrich-sized!"

"Why did 6 and 8 dislike 7? They thought 7 was pretty odd."

"Told my doctor I would lose 10 pounds in three months. That was three months ago and now I have 18 hours to lose 934 pounds."

"How do you get a bunch of Canadians out of a swimming pool? Say ""Get out of the pool."""

"COP: Anything you say can and will be used against you-- ME: Handcuff keys COP (to his partner): Damn, this guy's good"

"Interesting Fact: By the year 2020 all actors on American TV shows will be Australian."

"Don't be ashamed of who you are. That's your parents job."

"Whats the worst thing about the deaf women being raped She didn't hear them cumming"

"What did the grad students call the new Asian post-doc? The Yellow Fellow."

"What type of dog suffers from being inbred? A hotdog"