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Joke of the Day

"*talking into the phone, loudly enough that I know those ladies can hear me* WHATS THAT? MY SPACESHIP IS READY? GREAT, THANKS BARACK. OBAMA."

"So Mrs Lincoln... Besides that, how'd you like the play?"

"Explorers discover the holy grail only to find Kanye West drinking mountain dew out of it ""sup"" says Kanye"

"Two neanderthals had a baby... No Homo"

"Q: Did you hear about the new blonde paint? A: It's not real bright but it's cheap and spreads easy."

"I went to a feminist picnic recently It was terrible. No one cooked or made any sandwiches."

"What's the difference between a cow and 9/11? America can't milk a cow for 15 years."

"What's a pirate's favorite letter? R? You'd think that but it's the C."

"Why did the neckbeard become a doctor? He sure knows how to treat M'aladies"

"There is nothing wrong with window puns, I just don't like to shed light on them."