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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between Adolf Hitler and Neville Chamberlain? Neville Chamberlain takes a weekend in the country. Adolf Hitler takes a country in the weekend. (First told circa 1938)"

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"I used to know a friend who got sent to a mental hospital because he thought he was an orange. Poor Terry...... He got sectioned."
"What do you call a herd of masturbating cattle? Beef Strokin-off!"
"""Careful, there's poop on the dance floor."" - how ballet was invented."
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"I just realized I'm a bisexual. Every time I have sex, I have to buy it."
"What do you call it when two amoebas say hi? A micro-transaction."
"I tried committing suicide once... never doing that again, I almost killed myself."
"Who is the world s worst golfer? Hitler"
"How can a blind person tell if they're home? They check the architexture."