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Joke of the Day

"What do you call it when two amoebas say hi? A micro-transaction."

"I call bullshit on red wine reducing fat. If there was any truth to that, I'd resemble a crack addict."

"Being a gentleman never goes out of style."

"Hanging out with Helen Keller always made me feel like such a hipster. She'd never heard of any of the bands I like."

"According to every 80s movie ever, the only way to get home from school is by standing up in the back of a Jeep Wrangler with 5 other people"

"First time sex. I would tell you but the joke would finish to fast."

"Why should you never play Uno with a Mexican? Because they'll steal all the green cards."

"Why cannibals prefer to eat gay people? Because they have good taste."

"Remember a sense of humor does not mean that you tell him jokes, it means you laugh at his."

"[god creating an pigeon] what if i gave this piece of shit wings"