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Joke of the Day
"I invited a few friends to an orgy I was hosting... Everyone came."
Next Joke
"Doctor is rummaging through his bag looking for a pen... He pulls out a rectal thermometer instead, ""Ah goddammit some asshole has my pen!"""
"What's the difference between a northern fairytale and a southern fairytale? A northern fairytale begins ""Once upon a time ..."" A southern fairytale begins ""Y'all ain't gonna believe this shit ..."""
"There are 2 types of people in the world The ones who can count."
"When I was a kid 'friends with benefits' meant that kid had a nintendo."
"How do you confuse a blonde? Put her in a circle and tell her to go to the corner."
"If I could have dinner with anybody, living or dead, I'd have pizza."
"A friend's uncle asked how to use Amazon. He may need an Internet primer... ...do you think Sherwin-Williams makes one?"
"Women are like iPhones, you have to touch them all over before they respond. Men are like BBs, rub one ball & everything moves."
"My friend found a Paras while we were playing Pokemon Go. So I asked him, ""Was it under a truck?"""